If I Trust You (Mills & Boon Spice) Read online

  The weather conditions were perfect. Nick took the plane southward along the shoreline and then banked west, following the tip of a finger-shaped, sparkling Lake Michigan. The tower had denied him permission to fly in too close to Chicago, but even several miles away they could see the clean, sharp lines of the skyline as the Cessna glided over the brilliant blue lake.

  “It looks like a fairy city,” Deidre murmured from the seat beside him.

  He glanced at her. She gave him that little smile that always struck him like a fist to the gut. He exhaled with relief.

  Apparently, he’d been forgiven for inviting Brigit without consulting her.

  He knew what Deidre meant about Chicago. The tops of the high rises were partially occluded by wispy clouds. The city did look a little surreal, situated there on the distant shore.

  “Do you ever miss it, Deidre?” Brigit asked from the seat behind him. For a moment, Nick didn’t understand what she meant. Then he recalled that Deidre’s permanent home had been Chicago for all of her childhood. After the crash, Brigit had been forced to liquidate most of her and Derry’s assets to pay legal damages to the Itani and Reyes families. She’d moved onto Sycamore Avenue, making the Harbor Town vacation house her permanent home.

  “I miss it. I love Chicago. It’s such a great city,” Deidre replied.

  “I understand you’ve visited Marc and Liam there several times over the past few years,” Brigit said with what struck Nick as forced neutrality.

  “Yes. I have,” Deidre said.

  An awkward silence ensued, and Nick thought he understood why. Deidre had never driven the short distance to Harbor Town to visit her mother when she was in the vicinity.

  “Deidre, what was it like when you met Lincoln?” he heard Brigit ask after a moment. Her uncertain, timid voice struck him as highly uncharacteristic of the vibrant, intelligent older woman.

  He waited, acutely aware of Deidre where she sat beside him even though he didn’t watch her.

  “Well...” Deidre began hesitantly, “the first time I saw him, Lincoln called me by your name, Mom.”

  “He did?” Brigit asked.

  “Yes. My hair was long a few months back. I had just cut it off recently. It must have looked similar to when you were young and knew Lincoln,” she explained in a rush. She cleared her throat. “You can see why he might have become confused momentarily, between me and your younger self. Oftentimes he was very sharp mentally, but other times...he’d drift.”

  Nick sensed her glance at him and briefly met her stare.

  “When I explained to him I was Deidre, not Brigit Kavanaugh, he whispered, ‘Deidre Jean’ and he had this look on his face...almost as if he knew precisely who I was all of a sudden. That was one thing about Lincoln at the end of his life, don’t you think, Nick?” she asked, looking to him for corroboration. “Sometimes, you’d think he was totally out of it and confused, and then suddenly he’d say something spot-on, and you got the impression he understood things even better than you did.”

  Nick nodded. “Sometimes it seemed like he didn’t have a clue what I was talking about when it came to business decisions, and the next moment, he’d instruct me to do something completely brilliant that I hadn’t thought of, and he’d have all the details and the names of the players perfectly intact in his memory.”

  Only the engines rang in his ears for the next few seconds, each of them seemingly lost in their thoughts.

  “He must have recognized you on a very deep level,” Brigit mused.

  “He recognized you in me, Mom,” Deidre said, her gaze out the front window.

  “Maybe. But maybe he saw more than that.”

  The charged topic segued to more mundane matters. Nick found himself dwelling on Brigit’s enigmatic statement, however, as they flew over the tiny, picturesque community of Harbor Town perched on the shore of the great lake.

  What had Linc seen when he looked at Deidre? What had he seen when he saw Nick and her together? Nick was way too practical to think the answer was a future, which is what Linc had alluded to in his letter. Certainly Lincoln must have seen something though—something Deidre and he hadn’t begun to envision, until recently, anyway.

  Linc had craved a family for his entire life.

  Who was Nick to argue at the possibility that Linc thought he recognized it standing right in front of him during the last days of his life?

  * * *

  Nick insisted on taking them out to an early dinner after the flight. Deidre found herself relaxing and enjoying herself as they dined at Bistro Campagne and Nick and Brigit told stories about Lincoln’s favorite hobby, his horses. For the first time, Deidre discovered Lincoln had bred racehorses.

  “Lincoln was well-known on the racing circuit. So was his father, George,” Brigit assured Deidre when she expressed her amazement. “Lincoln owned Sacramento Sal, the winner of the Belmont Stakes and the Preakness two years running. Sal also placed at the Derby last year. Isn’t that right, Nick?” Brigit asked. Nick nodded. Deidre caught her mother’s eye. It struck her as bizarre that her mother followed horse racing all these years and knew so much about the topic.

  “What is it, Deidre?” Brigit asked.

  “Nothing,” she murmured. “It’s just that Nick took me out to McGraw Stables the other day. I had no idea you still rode. Addy McGraw told us you’ve been going out there since we bought the vacation home on Sycamore. I was surprised to learn from Lincoln that you were an excellent horsewoman. I’d had no idea until I met Addy you’d been riding all these years. Now I’m finding out you’re an expert on racehorses, as well.”

  “Not an expert, by any means. I just read a few articles.” Brigit’s gaze sharpened on her. “Were you upset to find out I had ridden out at McGraw Stables, even when you were a child?”

  Deidre’s gaze flickered uncomfortably around the elegant dining room. “No. Yes. A little. Why didn’t you ever take us to the stables?” she demanded.

  “I expect you already know the reason for that,” Brigit replied softly. “Do you think I wouldn’t have adored doing it, sharing my love of horses with my children?”

  Something pinched tight in her chest and throat. She glanced at Nick uncertainly. He watched her with so much warmth in his eyes, she felt as if he was holding her...a silent, solid support.

  “I feel like an outsider with the two of you when it comes to the topic of horses, that’s all. I wouldn’t know the front of a saddle from the back,” Deidre said with a smile, not wanting the moment to turn morose.

  “I told you—I’ve seen how horses respond to you,” Nick said, stirring his iced tea idly. “Some people are just born with the ability to put animals at ease. I expect you’re like that.”

  “I don’t know what you mean,” she said as the waiter cleared their plates. “All I did was pet a few horses while I was at The Pines.”

  “Captain was entranced by you,” Nick murmured. His quiet voice sounded so warm, she glanced into his rugged face and was caught by the heat of his stare. “And Captain is no pushover—trust me. He’s my horse.”

  She laughed. Nick shrugged and glanced at Brigit, unconcerned by her amusement. “She’s not buying it. Maybe we’ll just have to show her she’s a natural.”

  “I expect you’re right. Out of all my children, Deidre was always the animal lover, and they adored her in turn. I lost count of all the stray cats and dogs she brought home over the years, and that doesn’t include the lame bird and wounded lizard she doctored on the back porch,” Brigit said, smiling at Deidre.

  After the meal, Nick pulled her aside in the dim, empty entryway of Bistro Campagne while Brigit used the ladies’ room and made a quick phone call.

  “I know you said we shouldn’t do anything until we get the results of the paternity test, but I’d feel a lot more comfortable having Abel Warren con
tact you in regard to Lincoln’s will. He can advise you. I’ll pay his fee. It’s a fairly complicated document, and you could use someone in your corner.”

  Deidre studied her scarf as she tied it. “Actually...Marc suggested someone he knows who specializes in estate law take a look at it.”

  “Who did he recommend?” Nick asked.

  Deidre swallowed and met his stare. What was he thinking? His cool, impassive professional expression was back in place. She hesitated. “A man by the name of Mike Bonella.”

  Something shifted on his face.

  “You know who he is?” Deidre asked.

  “Yeah. He handled a case a few years back that was right out of the pages of that old soap opera, Dynasty—the spoiled children of Howard Ernst versus Howard’s very young bride of nine months. Bonella won. So did the young wife.” His eyebrows quirked up. “Sounds like your brother is looking out for you.”

  Deidre closed her eyes briefly as mortification flashed through her. “I haven’t called him yet, Nick. I hope I don’t have to. Marc just gave me Bonella’s name.”

  “I’m glad he gave it to you.”

  She started. “You are?”

  Nick nodded. “The more sound advice you get, the better. But Abel was loyal to the bone to Lincoln, and he’ll be loyal to you, in turn. He knows Lincoln’s estate like no other. You can trust him. It wouldn’t hurt to at least talk to Abel and get his insight on the whole thing. I can tell you what I know, but because of the circumstances, there are those who would think the information I give you is skewed to my benefit. I’d rather you didn’t have to worry about that.”

  Dread settled like lead in the pit of her stomach. She wasn’t sure how she was supposed to feel about Nick thinking it was a good idea to have so many legal guns on her side. “Why would you recommend I have someone in my corner? Have you decided to contest the will?”

  “No. I know now you didn’t have any part in coercing Lincoln in any way. I’m just saying you should get good legal counsel because I don’t want anyone making ugly accusations about me influencing you unduly. If you want access to your funds before we get the results of the paternity test, just tell Abel. You are free to do that now, Deidre. I wouldn’t stop you.”

  Heat warmed her cheeks. Talk about an awkward situation.

  “I told you—I don’t want to do anything like that until I get the official word as to whether or not I’m Lincoln’s child. If I took any money without knowing that, if I did anything without knowing that first, I’d feel like a...”

  “What?”

  “Fraud,” she whispered.

  He frowned and glanced toward the hallway behind them. Deidre turned to see her mother approaching, a smile on her face. The loaded conversation with Nick would just have to wait.

  After they’d dropped her mother off on Sycamore Avenue, Deidre asked if they could stop at the Shop and Save. They were getting out of the car when Nick got a call.

  “I should take this,” he said, glancing up from his phone. “Do you mind if I just stay in the car?”

  “No, of course not,” Deidre assured.

  By the time she returned, he was still on the call. He hung up and got out of the car, but she’d already tossed the two light bags into the backseat.

  “Is that all you got?” he asked as they got back in the sedan.

  “It’s just dessert. I thought we might want something later,” she explained as she put on her seat belt. “What?” she asked when she saw his frown.

  “I have to fly to San Francisco for a few days. There was a chemical fire at one of our pharmaceutical companies.”

  “Was anyone hurt?”

  “One man has been hospitalized with significant burns, but he’s stable,” he said as he drove through the parking lot. “All the other employees were treated for minor injuries at the local emergency room and discharged. I’m thankful no one was killed. The fire was extensive though.

  “I’m sorry about having to leave,” he told her when he pulled into the driveway a few minutes later and put the car into park. “I make it a habit to go and inspect our facilities immediately following accidents. I don’t like to hear things second- and thirdhand about something so crucial.”

  She swallowed, struck by the way he kept saying “our.”

  “There’s nothing to be sorry for,” she assured him. “You’re absolutely right. Please—go and do whatever is necessary to make sure everyone there is safe.”

  He glanced into the backseat. “Come on. I’ll help you with the bags.”

  “No,” she insisted. “There are just a couple items. You have more important things to think about.”

  He frowned. “You’re important.”

  She smiled. “Well, I’m not going anywhere.”

  He gave a quick bark of laughter. “Good,” he said. “Because I’ll be back to Harbor Town before you know it.” He leaned over and kissed her.

  A minute later, she got out of the car with her bags in tow and waved as he backed out of the drive. She trudged up the squeaking, frozen front stairs to the dark cottage. Nick’s goodbye kisses were always delicious, but they only seemed to highlight the empty, heavy feeling that inevitably settled in her belly when he was gone.

  Chapter Nine

  Deidre spent the following morning at the Family Center helping Colleen paint a new playroom for clients’ children. It was the perfect opportunity for Colleen to pump Deidre about information in regard to her date with Nick and the outing with their mother. She’d forgotten to mention Addy’s comments about Brigit to Colleen. Colleen was just as stunned as Deidre had been to learn their mother had been horseback riding in secret all this time.

  “Liam was right,” Colleen said as she rolled bright yellow paint onto the wall. “Mom has been eaten away by guilt all these years. She wanted to keep Lincoln and her love of horses and that part of her life...all of it separate from us.”

  Deidre said nothing, just resumed doing some corner work with a brush. Unfortunately, the “all of it” that Brigit had kept separate from Deidre was half of her family.

  That afternoon, she purchased a box of assorted cookies from Celino’s and drove it out to the McGraw Stables. Addy gave her a huge toothy grin and a hug for her gift. She sat with the friendly woman for a half hour at her kitchen table, sipping coffee and listening to Addy reminisce about her mother.

  It struck Deidre how strange it was, the different faces an individual showed the people in their life. Addy found Brigit Kavanaugh to be an unfailingly kind, courageous, talented horsewoman, and a loyal friend. Derry had always respected his wife’s strength of character and her role as a mother. As an adult looking back in time, Deidre realized Derry had certainly found Brigit attractive...alluring. Her mother had a certain elusive quality about her, as though part of her would always remain a mystery. Lincoln, too, had been captivated by Brigit, idealizing her, putting her up on a pedestal, never entirely getting over his love for her.

  As a child, Deidre had lived in the secure cocoon of her mother’s warmth and love, never doubting it would be there any more than she doubted air would enter her lungs on her next inhale. When she’d learned what Brigit had done, it’d been like having the breath knocked clean out of her.

  “Your mama is a great lady,” Addy concluded fondly, drawing Deidre out of her reflections. “All that charity work she does, and she visits a lot of the older ladies in town, people in need, cheering them up, taking them to their doctor’s appointments and such. They don’t make them like your mother anymore.”

  Deidre smiled and patted Addy’s weathered hand. “Thank you for talking with me about my mom.”

  Addy’s expression softened. “You come out here anytime to talk about anything you like, you hear?”

  Deidre returned to Cedar Cottage, feeling thoughtful. She wrapped Ch
ristmas presents and placed them under the tree, admiring the way the colored lights struck the festive paper.

  The sound of ringing jarred her. For a few seconds, she just stared at her cell phone. What if this was it—the call from GenLabs she’d been both dreading and anticipating for weeks on end?

  She took courage and glanced at the number. She exhaled in relief.

  “Hi,” she said, smiling as sat back on the cushions.

  “Hi. What are you up to?” Nick asked, his deep, quiet voice causing a thrill of awareness to go through her.

  “Really important stuff—wrapping Christmas presents and staring at the Christmas tree. How are things there?”

  “As good as can be expected,” Nick replied evenly enough, but she heard the grim edge to his tone. “We inspected the plant this morning and I met with the safety director and manager.”

  “How is the man who was injured?”

  “His name’s Edgar Grant. He’s obviously not the most comfortable with third degree burns on his legs and hip, but he’ll be out of the hospital in a few days. His sense of humor is intact, anyway.”

  “Did you actually visit him in the hospital?” Deidre asked.

  “Yeah, just briefly. The nurse was about to dress his burns. What else did you do today?”

  She’d been about to express her amazement that the CEO of an enormous conglomerate had taken the time to visit an injured employee of a small subsidiary plant but she ceased when he changed the topic. Nick obviously didn’t think his actions were noteworthy, even if she did. “Oh, I helped Colleen paint a playroom at the Family Center and I took some cookies out to Addy McGraw. Addy talked a lot about my mom.”

  “She’s a real fan of your mom, that’s for sure.” He paused. “I hope it’s okay for me to say, but I like your mother, too. She reminds me a little of Lily DuBois.”